


“The Hardest Part of This Is Leaving You”

by serenediosdada



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Gore, M/M, final destination gore, hope you cry too, i cried while typing, im a sensitive person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-25
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2019-05-28 13:16:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15049898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serenediosdada/pseuds/serenediosdada
Summary: Love may be eternal for some but it can also be fleeting for others. Others like Seo Youngho and Moon Taeil.





	1. Chapped and Faded

**Author's Note:**

  * For [scenarios](https://archiveofourown.org/users/scenarios/gifts).



1 Month Before… 

 

I started wearing hats more often. It’s been getting a lot worse these days. I’m not afraid of death. I’m afraid of losing him. They said I don’t have much time. I don’t want him to find out. I have to break up with him before it’s too late. To cause him less pain and to let him move on. We’ve been together for at least three years now. I hope he hates me so it won’t hurt him as much when I leave this world.

For a month, I’ve been thinking of how I can break the news to Johnny. I have cancer. I’m sorry. No, I can't do that to him. I have to lie to him. I can't have him mourn for me. Please youngho, let me be selfish. 

I put on a long trench coat and headed out to meet with the love of my life. Earlier, during the day, he had sent me a text.

hey! let's meet up later. dress up a little. x 

Seo Youngho

With that text, he also sent me an address to go to. Usually, we would go to each other's houses and just eat dinner or watch movies/shows. This must be special. 

I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply before breathing out. I entered a building foreign to me. Its exterior looked pretty plain. I didn't like it in its shade of black. The very shade/color that reminds me of my nearing death. I couldn't say the same about the inside.

The interior of the building looked beautiful. I took it all in. The flooring was made of marble, the walls were adorned with intricate designs in the color of gold. What I also noticed was the beautiful flower arrangements that surrounded the entire room. Now the ceiling took my breath away. There was a giant crystal chandelier that must have cost a fortune. 

Right under the chandelier, there stood my love, my John Seo. In his hand, he held a bouquet of my favorite flower, which happened to be baby's breath.

He smiled at me lovingly as he made his way down the grand staircase. That smile always made me weak in the news. Despite being older than him, John always managed to make my heart flutter ever so delicately. He gently held my hand in his, lifting it to his face. His lips lightly grazed the back of my hand. I couldn't help but feel blood rush to my cheeks.

I’ve always loved this about him. He somehow, no matter how bad the situation is, made me forget about the world for a moment and made me focus on him, on us. I snapped from my thoughts when I saw his lips move but not hear them making any sound.

"What was that, Youngho? I didn't catch what you said." I asked him to repeat his words. He smiled oh so sweetly.

"I’m excited to reveal our night's festivities. One at a time, of course. First things first, we'll be having dinner." He responded as he intertwined our hands together. "Let’s go, shall we?"

John led me up the steps of the grand staircase. On the way up, we chatted and had a few light laughs. We made our way to the door to the roof. Before opening the door, John went behind me to cover my eyes, saying that it's a surprise.

“Alright, alright. I’m not peaking.” I chuckled, putting my hands on top of his. I heard him open the door.

“Small steps now.” He whispered into my ear. I nodded as we both walked a few steps forward together. He took his hands off my face, revealing where we will be dining tonight.

It wasn’t as grand as the first room we were in but it was much more special. We were at the rooftop so obviously no roof. A small table for two with our favorite foods and candles. It was so romantic. A candlelight dinner. 

Johnny held my hand in his as we strolled over to the table. He pulled my seat for me. I smiled at him in thanks before taking a seat. He pushed the chair closer to the table.

He took a seat across me. He didn’t say anything and just offered his hand out to me. I interlocked our fingers. 

“Let’s eat?” I said in a questioning manner. He hummed in agreement, nodding.

We ate in silence. The food was delicious, of course. He’s making such an effort. I planned on breaking up with him but he’s making it even harder now. I blinked the tears away.

It seemed Youngho had more plans after dinner. Soon after the lovely candlelight meal, he made me wear a blindfold. It was a bit strange wearing one and not being in bed. 

With the blindfold on, all I could see was complete darkness. Sometimes, I was really afraid of the dark and sleeping. I would wonder what if I fell asleep and never woke up? But it was okay. His warm hand comforted me.

I felt us move into a car. He let me lean against his shoulder during the ride. I inhaled his cologne, a scent I always loved. 

“So, where exactly are we going, Youngho?” 

“You’ll see, love, you’ll see.” 

We exited the car and I felt his hand leave mine. 

“Youngho? Johnny? Where are we?” I asked, my voice sounding a bit frantic. Who wouldn’t be scared if your boyfriend left you somewhere with a blindfold on?

The blindfold left my face. Bright lights pierced my vision, making me blink and squint. I adjusted my eyes to the light, blinking. In front of me was a carnival. A carnival without anybody else except for the staff.

“What do you think, love?” I heard Johnny’s voice, feeling his arms wrapped around me from behind.

“It’s amazing..! But how? This should cost about a month or two of work!” I exclaimed. 

“How come you didn’t ask me this earlier at that hotel?” 

“I was in shock, okay! Baby, this is too much..” 

“Nothing is too much for me if the money’s spent on you.” I felt his lips pressed against my cheek, making me sigh in defeat.

“Fine. But let’s go! Where should we go first? The carousel? That’s really good for selfies. Ooh, there’s a roller coaster! And there’s bumper cars! What about the arcade?” I spoke like a little kid who’s just tasted cake for the first time in his life.

All negative thoughts inside my head faded away for the night. Thoughts about my cancer, death, leaving Seo Youngho. They all faded away.

I didn’t even know why he stayed with me for so many years. I acted like a child. I was clingy, needy, made bad puns, etc. But I’m glad he stuck around. 

He looked like he was about to barf when we rode those swings that would go really high and fast for the fourth time. I made him sit the fifth time out. 

I was all giddy as the swing went up and began to go faster by the second. I looked down at where Johnny was and he wasn’t there. I looked around and saw him with the one of the staff.

He looked mad at the staff person. He was shouting? I couldn’t tell? I was starting to get scared. What was happening down there?

One of the metal wires that suspended my chair in the air made a sound, sounding as if it was going to break. Oh my God..

I shut my eyes tightly. Even though I knew I was going to die soon, I didn’t know I was going to die this soon. I wish I didn’t have this stupid cancer. I’m sorry I can’t kick cancer’s butt, Johnny. Heck, I don’t have the chance.

The wires soon snapped.

 

 

“TAEIL…!”


	2. It Just Ain’t Living

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is in Johnny’s point of view and takes place a month after the accident.

“TAEIL...!”

Every time I shut my eyes, I always see that scene. I see his body slowly fall to the ground, bones cracking.

I shuddered and woke up with a jolt. I rushed to the bathroom, letting out my feelings into the toilet.

Not long after the incident, I found out from the doctors that my love had cancer. It broke my heart, not knowing that he was suffering all this time.

I blinked the tears away and sighed softly. I ran my fingers through my hair. I put on a grey shirt and black ripped jeans.

I shrugged on a black coat. I also wrapped a white scarf around my neck. 

I picked up a bouquet of baby’s breaths and went out the door. 

I rode a taxi there and finally arrived. I followed a familiar path and found what I was looking for.

Moon Taeil  
June 14, 1994 — August 3, 2018  
A loving son and inspiring brother

I kneeled down to the level of the tombstone and gently traced the name.

I laid the bouquet down and lit a candle. 

I reached into my pocket and took out a small black box.

“Taeil, my love, this is the thing I was trying to give you that day.. I’m sorry.” Tears rolled down my face as I opened the box, revealing a beautiful ring.

I let out a shaky sigh and closed the box. I placed it next to the bouquet. I stood up and rubbed the top of the tombstone gently.

“Goodbye, Moon Taeil, my love.”


End file.
